Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz Answer was...

Mel Gibson. Watch out for the new quiz on Monday. Or get it early every week by signing up for the newsletter here (if you haven't already).

Kid Rock is on our side

Here is a good article on why Kid Rock decked Tommy Lee. But the quote that struck me the most from the article was, "Britney Spears doesn't have a clue and she doesn't have anyone to kick her ass and say 'get the f*** out of LA', go back to wherever you're from, Louisiana or wherever it is, look after your two kids properly and just calm down." Well, yes she does and it's called The Friends of Celebrities. We are providing a viable service that stars need. So, get your friends to join up, now!

NEW Celebrity Warning Signs - No Jail

In honour of Phil Spectors release I have invented a new sign - 'get off scott free'. I'll need it for all the times Pete Doherty escapes jail. Hopefully Mike Tyson, O.J. Simpson and Kiefer Sutherland will be seeing this sign very soon.

Spector walks free!

This is the story I guessed would happen this week and I wasn't far wrong. Phil Spector has escaped jail because of mistrial after the jury failed to reach a conclusion.

Celebrity Warning Signs - There's a trend here.

Here is a picture of Keifer Sutherland leaving his car. Something he should have done earlier this week. Caught doing an illegal U-turn after a book signing, he was tested and failed a sobriety test. He now faces jail after being caught previously for the same offence. Maybe he can share a cell with Mike Tyson. That will be nice.

Celebrity Warning Signs - Jail

Yup, looks like Tyson could be sent to jail for three years for possession and driving under the influence of cocaine. Nearly crashed into a police car as he left the nightclub and was seen brushing a white powder from the dashboard by the cops. It will be his third time inside, once for rape and once for assault, so he should be used to it by now. Do we have any Friends of Celebrities on the inside? We could use a few the way things are going.

Posh to join Pussy Cat Dolls

Yes, it's true (oh no). But only for a one off show (phew!). She claims she is a big fan, but is she just copying Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera, who have already done this? And is she just doing it to raise her profile in the U.S.?

Cat Fight!

Every wedding loves a good brawl. So when you invite Sienna Miller and Kate Moss to the best day of your life don't forget that they like to hog the limelight. They had a bit of a barney on the dance floor after a few beers (just like the drunk uncle that every family has). Pathetically the arguement went along the lines of, "You've stolen my friends and you've stolen my life!"

Come on Kate, I'm sure you've still got some of your own friends. And why not share some modelling work? There's plenty to go around. You can't advertise everything yourself (although admittedly you are doing your best). Chill out, sister. Why so paranoid? Anyone would think your were on something.

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz

Who is this? Answer on Friday.

This Weeks Newsletter

Click here or on 'FOC! GLOSSY' on the right to see this weeks newsletter. Or to have it delivered to your inbox every week just click here or on 'SIGN UP!'. Plus if you sign up you could be selected to meet up with one of our celebrity clients. Enjoy!

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz Answer was...

Ozzy Osbourne! Looking like a scarecrow, the Prince of Darkness wears a sensible warm hat. Click on 'QUIZ' to see all the other Screwed Up Celebrities. Don't worry, your boss isn't looking.

Language. Sex. Violence. Other?

Language. Sex. Violence. Other? is the title of a Stereophonics album and that was certainly the question asked of the boys after they got into a fight with bouncers at fancy Kensington Nightspot, Amika. The reason? After £5,000 worth of champagne the singer Kelly Jones went into the ladies toilet? Despite his very verbal plea's that he was only looking for his girlfriend, the bouncers threw him out, which he attempted to foil, using his fists. The other band members tried to help but just got thrown out too. That would never happen at the Nags Head.

Stay at home, Mom

It's the one week when you'd think Britney had the common sense to stay in and look after her kids. But hours after being told by a judge she should see a psychiatrist, she prooved what a good Mom she is by hitting her two favourite Hollywood nightspots. K-Fed may be an idiot, but even he has the intelligence to have an early night when the future of his relationship with his children are at stake.

MOBO winners

Click here for the winners of the MOBO's courtesy of NME. The show had a 50 Cent discount after Fiddy refused to show up, leaving Kanye West to win two of the three awards he was nomintaed for. Amy Winehouse won Best UK Female, but her win was overshadowed by her spitting on stage, staggering around before the performance, throwing whatever she could get her hands on at people around her, slurring her words. Her actual performance was also lack-lustre.

Don't forget Next Week's News

Don't forget to click on 'NEXT WEEK'S NEWS' on the right, for a bit of hilarity as we guess next weeks top stories. Or do you not want to have fun?

Oooooops

Looks like Paris has dropped her bible and, despite telling the world she was shunning the party lifestyle (while in jail), it looks like she's back to her good old self. And why not? Everyone deserves to unwind.

Britney Spears Custody Battle Update Exposed - Too

It's been another busy day for the courts and Britney Spears:

She has been ordered to random twice weekly alcohol and drug tests.

The judge ordered both Brit and K-Fed to not physically discipline their children and to stop others from doing so.

Britney must take eight hours of parenting classes every week.

Both parents are banned from consuming drink or drugs for 12 hours before having custody of the kids.

However, as a Friend of Celebrities I say that these measures are good for both parents and the kids. They are getting a helping hand where most people around them are just out for the take. I hope they follow the court's advice. However, what is worrying is OK! magazine claims they have a source who states Britney has an eating disorder, binging and purging herself to loose weight. They also claim she is addicted to dieting pills and washes them down with coffee and redbull. Although those are not confirmed. Let's hope not.

A Chip Off The Old Jenny From The Block

The news is that Jannifer Lopez is 12 weeks pregnant. The insider source alays claims that she is expecting twins. The Friends of Celebrities should start off child minding. It could be a whole new arm to the business.

Britney Spears Custody Battle Exposed

Just a heads up at what's happening as it was a busy day for Britney yesterday:

Britney's lawyer has dropped her because she is a "problem client"

K-Fed was originally wanting custody of the kids for two thirds of the time. He now wants more.

Britney's ex-bodyguard will testify in the court case that Britney took drugs in front of her children and walked around naked in front of the children. (Not sure why that naked bit is such a crime?)

The FBI has denied that they are investigating a contract out on Kevin Federlines life.

Britney has lost full custody of her children, but only temporarily.

Britney Spears has been dropped by her new manager. Due to her erratic behaviour.

So Britney will be needing all the friends she can muster. So tell everyone you know to sign up for Friends of Celebrities. Pleeeeeeeease.

50 Pence cancels UK shows

I can't believe it! Is 50 Cent really going to retire after his album failed to beat Kanye West's offering on both sides of the pond? He said he would. But now he seems to be going through with it and has cancelled all his upcoming UK events, leaving the Vodafone Live Music awards and the MOBO's in the lurch. AND he has postponed his European promotional trip.

Nobody likes a sore loser, Fiddy. It just goes to show just because you say you are the best and threaten to retire if you don't hit the top spot, doesn't mean that you will. It just shows that you believe in your own hype. Having said that though, we forgive you. Just don't hide away and if you need a Friend, you know where we are.

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz

The new week can only mean one thing! Answer on Friday. Good luck.

Back on?

Is Nadine Coyle from Girls Aloud back on with Jesse Metcalfe? The Sun seems to think so.

EMMY Awards

Click here for the full list of winners of the EMMY awards. Winners highlights were Helen Mirren. Ricky Gervais and Ugly Betty. However, there was a no show for Britney Spears, who was tipped to make an apology for her MVA performance. Rumours are flying that her erratic behavious has spirraled out of control and she was thrown out of a top hotel after smearing food on her face in the restaurant.

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz Answer was...

Pete Doherty. Although that English copper in the background was a bit of a clue. See you on monday for the next quiz. If you can't wait until then, click on 'QUIZ' on the right hand side for the previous weeks' fun.

Kanye Vs Fiddy

50 Cent has vowed to retire if his album doesn't do better than Kanye West's new offering. So, if you don't like 50 Cent or you think he needs bringing down to earth, this is what Kanye's new album looks like. (Currently Kanye is ahead.)

Lohan sued for $250,000

A man is suing Lazy for compensation after her Mercedes crashed into his van in 2005. Although, she was cleared of being drunk at the time, the driver has been given the go ahead by courts to sue. Could she have been on something else?

Spot the difference

Good news. The recent band wagon of the come back tour has been jumped on by the inventors of Rock, Led Zeppelin. The reason? Well Robert Plant confirmed he was offered "a shed load of disreputable dollars". It's not a come back as much as a reform, as Led Zep have never really gone away.

So who is the other group planning to sell out? It's cheeky british R'n'B boy band, Blue. I honestly thought Duncan came from French heritage and his surname was Frombleu, because his is only ever referred to as: Duncan from Blue. Even now, despite the fact he is not in Blue and an actor. However, he is the only one who needs convinvincing of the re-union. He is also the only one with any sort of career left. The two may well be connected.

Kelly Chicago Osbourne

Kelly had her opening night as Mama Morton. She had a few celeb friends in to watch. In fact they delayed the start for many Friends of Celebrities who were there to take a peek. The list goes:

Loius Walsh
Sharon Osbourne
Ozzy Osbourne
Kate Moss
Amy Winehouse
Kate Moss
Davinia Taylor
Blake Fielder-Civil
Any body else?

Hells kitchen

It turns out that Jim was asked to leave. Although, he assures us that he was thinking of going. I doubt he really thinks at all.

Posh Frocks

Naomi Campbell has a famous rift with Posh Spice that goes back seven years. Naomi claims that Posh is talentless. And the Spice Girl famously called the model a "massive cow". However, Naomi is making the first move and inviting Victoria to a charity fashion event.

Posh was also in the news as she stole the limelight at a fashion show in New York, as all eyes were on her and her stunning two changes of clothing.

Hell's (Kitchen) Bells

Watched UK celebrity zoo, Hell's Kitchen last night. Extended shock episode. After comedian Jim Davidson's homophobic attack on Brian Dowling, Brian was a bit upset, standing up for himself despite crying so much he could hardly talk. "I'm speechless," he said.

So, Jim immediately had a go at him for playing the victim. But immediatly, when told that times had moved on, Jim himself turned victim (and hypocrite) by saying something along the lines of, "Well, if the world is changing and its no longer ok to be racist and homophobic, then what happens to people like me?"

Unlucky Jim, things moved on, but your comedy stayed dated. Where are his friends in all this? Probably agreeing with everything he says. At least his (only) friend in the house, singer Paul Young, told him the truth by saying, "Sorry Jim, I just don't know why you did that, mate."

No, us niether.

The website says Jim has now left, although the presenter claimed on the show last night that he was asked to leave.

And the best punch award goes to...

At the MTV music video awards yesterday there was a bit of a sideshow. A fight broke out between Pamela Anderson's ex's Tommy Lee and Kid Rock. Click here if you missed it.

What made me laugh was that despite this picture of Tommy giving it the hard man, hold-me-back-or-I'm-gonna-do-something-I-regret routine and initiating the altercation, he actually did nothing. A witness said, ""Tommy started to antagonise Kid, and then when Tommy stood up Kid hit him first with a backhand. Tommy looked like he was trying to aggressively retaliate and then Kid hit him again."

They then sort of hugged each other for a bit, wrestling style, until security broke them up. Ahhhh. The really sad thing of course is that they are both nothing to do with Pammy anymore. They need Friends of Celebrities to have a word!

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz

Who is it this week? Is it easy? Or is it hard? If it's too easy why not click 'QUIZ' on the right hand side for previous week's fun. If its too hard, don't worry the answer is coming on friday. Good luck!

Kanye ain't saying she's a rubbish singer...

He's not saying that about Britney Spears. But the down to earth rapper (seen here with twenty gold painted women) is saying this about her MTV performance:

“I can’t believe she would perform. She hasn’t had a hit record in years.”

MTV Video Music Awards

Click here for the results of this years MTV Video awards. It was a good year for Justin Trousersnake and Rihanna's Umbrella.

However, talk of the town was Britney's terrible performance. Lip-synching and wandering around stage as if she couldn't are less or was awkward. Although, after the few months she's had, I'm not surprised she was tentatively dancing as if the whole world was looking and her and wanting her to mess up. Especially as that is what was really happening.

She was a shadow of her former self. But the Friends of Celebrities will stick by you. Get in touch.

Dog-herty's Crack Cat

Is Pete Doherty's cat on crack? Click here to see a pic and make your mind up. And did you know crack squirrels are a recognised problem in American parks? Remember, Friends of Celebrities don't let celebrities feed crack to their pets!

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz Answer was...

Courtney Love! I don't know why she's making those devil horns, she's a little angel. More Screwed Up celebrities on Monday. Or play the previous quizzes by clicking on 'QUIZ' on the right. Have a great weekend!

Lily Allen split?

She has split with long term love Seb Chew. I think he was too old for her anyway. NEXT!

It's not over til' the fat man doesn't sing

We were sorry to hear that Luciano Pavarotti has died aged 71. I particularly liked his song, "Just one Cornetto". Although, I suspect he had more than one.

APPEAL: Save Robbie Williams!

Where's Robbie? We miss you! I'm thinking of starting a Save Robbie Williams Appeal. He is a national treasure and should be brought back home to England. Or helped to conquer American Super-stardom.

Go to amazing website purerobbie.com for further info on him and the chance to write to Robbie himself through their website. And together we can SAVE ROBBIE WILLIAMS. Cool!

Kate Moss back with rocker

This article from The Sun reports that kate moss is dating this fellow in the picture. The paper reports "KATE MOSS has finally ditched druggie ex PETE DOHERTY for good — to date a VEGAN rocker." Which sort of implies that this guy is completely different and, vegan, so must be a clean living kind of chap.

However, the paper then goes on to say, "They were spotted snogging in a pub in Notting Hill, West London, during a marathon booze bender on Saturday with actor pals RHYS IFANS and SIENNA MILLER."

Before then stating, "Kate and Jamie’s 30- hour session ended only on Monday morning."

So, is he actually going to be that much different? Well, come to think about 'smelly slug' Pete, this guy is probably an angel.

Klaxons win Mercury Music Prize

Congatulations to the Klaxons who won the prestigious Mercury Music Prize yesterday. The Friends of Celebrities are pleased for you.

However, I was sad too. I had to look up who won on the website because the TV news is only reporting that Amy Winehouse gave her first performance since her public bust upand obvious drug addiction. Questions raised were 'did she not win because that would send out the wrong message?' and 'Should she have been invited.' Its all the press stirring up a fuss about nothing and just getting in the way of the main thing: the music.

The fact is, that the Klaxons won because their music deserved it and nothing to do with what Winehouse did or didn't 'do'. Well done, boys!

UK: New, Scarier Hell's Kitchen

Lets keep our eyes on the latest celebrity zoo 'Hell's Kitchen' for any signs that these people need one of the Friends of Celebrities. Also, Ramsey's been axed and replaced with Marco Pierre White. Who is more generous and reasonable than Gordon, but at the same time a hell of a lot more scary, without the need to swear like a chav.

Here are the contestants with a handy guide of what they do (just in case you don't have a clue who they are, like Marco):

Actress Adele Silva
Model Abigail Clancy
Actress Kelly LeBrock
Former newspaper editor Rosie Boycott
TV presenter Anneka Rice
Singer Paul Young
Comedian Jim Davidson
TV presenter Brian Dowling
Singer Lee Ryan
Former boxer Barry McGuigan

Celebrity Tip Number 1

Not in any particular order, here is the first of many celebrity tips.

Just because you are madly in love (most new couples are) and you can afford to get married, doesn't mean that you should.

If you have a tip for a celebrity please email john@friendsofcelebrities.com or leave a post.

Children: Gotta catch 'em all

Brad Pitt has hinted that he and Angelina are ready for more kids. Although he did not stipulate whether they would be adopting or having their own child one thing is for sure they are continuing to collect kids like Pokemon.

He said that having children, "is the most fun I've ever had." You have to ask him is he talking about having children, or making them?

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz

Can you guess the answer? I'll let you know on friday but don't forget to come back every day to see whats new.

FoC! Glossy

I have chosen a name for the weekly email. FoC! is, of course, the initials of Friends of Celebrities. There will be an archive here but there's only one at the moment. Sign up and you'll get it in your inbox every week.

NEW: Check out Harpies Bizarre

Harpies Bizarre is the Friends of Celebrities new fashionista. Click here for the latest down-to-earth fashion news for the stars.