Sunday, 31 August 2008

It's Good To Be Back?


Click here for a message from Gary Glitter. The lyrics have an eerie relevance:

Hello, Hello. It's good to be back, it's good to be back.
Hello, Hello. It's good to be back, it's good to be back.

Did you miss me, Yeah, while I was away,
did you hang my picture on your wall
Did you kiss me, Yeah, every single day,
although you couldn't kiss me at all.
And did you love me, Yeah, like a good little girl,
Did you tell that naughty boy not to call,
did you love me, Yeah, in your own little world,
Although you couldn't see me at all,
although you couldn't see me at all,

Hello, Hello, it's is good to be back, it's good to be back,
Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, I'm back again, I'm back,
I'm on the right track,
Hello, Hello tell all your friends I'm back, I'm back as a matter of fact,
as a matter of factI'm back

Did youmiss me me, Yeah, while I was gone,
Did you 'hug your pillow in your bed
Did you kiss me, Yeah, all night long and treasure every word I said
And did you want me, Yeah, to come back again
Did you know I've been so far away, did you want me, Yeah,
Did you tell all your friendsto think about me every day
To think about me every day

Hello, Hello, it's is good to be back, it's good to be back,
Hello, Hello, it's is good to be back, it's good to be back,
Hello, Hello,I'm back again, I'm back, I'm back I'm on the right track,
And did you miss me, Yeah, while I was away,
did you hang my picture on your wall,
Did you miss me, Yeah, every single day,
although you couldn't kiss me at all,
although you couldn't kiss me at all,

Hello, Hello, it's is good to be back, it's good to be back,
Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, I'm back again, I'm back, I'm on the right track,
Hello, Hello, it's is good to be back, it's good to be back,

Goodness, Gracious, Hello, Hello......

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz



Can you guess the Screwed Up Celebrity this week? Good luck!

Don't wanna be in his gang!



Friends of Celebrities
The first agency supplying grounded friends to celebrities
Monday 1st September 2008

www.friendsofcelebrities.com

The big bad news was of fallen glam-rock superstar Gary Glitter’s release from a Vietnamese jail after serving four years for paedophile offences. Chaos ensued as he was banned from flying on some airlines, whilst others let him fly but refused to sell him first class tickets. A stop-over at Thailand ended in disaster as authorities told him to leave the country or be put in jail. Eventually he got a flight to the UK where he was immediately escorted off the plane by armed police and questioned.

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Baby Boom
There has been a spate of births and conception. Here they are and congratulations to them all:
-Spice Girl Mel C is expecting her first child.
-Singer Ricky Martin has had twins with a surrogate mother.
-Gwen Stefani and husband Gavin Rossdale gave birth to their second child, a boy they felt the need to name Zuma Nesta Rock Rossdale. Poor kid.
-Matt Damon has had a third child with his wife, a girl called Gia Zavala.

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Happy 50th Birthday Michael Jackson!

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Sienna Millers Home Trashed
Someone has been painting and decorating at Sienna Millers North London home. The word ‘SLUT’ and a symbol of the devil have been graffitied onto a wall of her home.


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Become Paris’s Best Friend
Paris Hilton is looking for a new best friend in a new reality TV programme called, ‘Paris Hiltons Best Friend’. Pah! To get a real friend she should just contact the Friends of Celebrities.

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This Weeks Top Celebrity Searches

1. Angelina Jolie
2. Paris Hilton
3. Brad Pitt
4. Gary Glitter
5. Britney Spears

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BUY YOUR FAVOURITE CELEB AS A GREETINGS CARD NOW!

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Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz
Did you get that last week’s answer to the quiz? It’s posted now on the blog, so check it out. There’s a new quiz posted here plus a whole lot of other stuff too.

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Relationships On:
Peaches Geldof + Max Drummey (married after four weeks)

Relationships Off:
Jennifer Aniston + John Mayer
Michael Bolton + Nicolette Sheridan
Kelly Brook + Billy Zane


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X-files star David Duchovny has admitted himself to rehab for sex addiction. Should that be XXX-files? (ho ho!)

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Anderton Kicked Out of Club
Ex-cocaine addict and high class prostitute Sophie Anderton was up to her old tricks this week after getting booted out of posh Kitts nightclub for throwing drinks at fellow revellers. It’s not the first time. Last time she was kicked out for chucking ice cubes.



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Lily Allen Punches Public
Lily Allen felt the need to punch a woman who was insulting her mother this week. The woman laughed of the punches and walk away. Rhys Ifans also had an embarrassing fight with a photographer. The pap was papped smiling and holding off Rhys with one effortless hand.

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Black-eyed Kelly Osbourne Punches Gossip Columnist
Kelly Osbourne slapped a fellow clubber at a swanky London nightspot this week. It turns out it was a reporter who had written an unfavourable account of the princess of darkness. The artcle claimed Kelly was dim for not knowing what an earthquake was. Fair point, as she grew up in earthquake prone California.

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Reality TV star Jade Goody has been diagnosed with cervical cancer during filming of India’s version of Big Brother.

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Pete Doherty Fought The Law
Mr Doherty has been banned from playing in the English countryside after police warned the Babyshambles gig could be too raucous. However, Doherty who is no stranger to the long arm of the law is determined to play the gig and go to jail, rather than disappoint his fans. Although, once before he missed a gig because his cat was missing. Must be the drugs.


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And finally…
Poor Duffy. The platinum selling artist is so poor that she cannot afford tights. The singer hasn’t been given a penny of her album sales until an annual royality cheque come through. However, when it does I’m sure the hosiery is on her!

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Thanks for signing up. You’re the best. Invite others to become a Friend of Celebrities today. The more the merrier!!! Thanks.

John
Founder, The Friends of Celebrities

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz Answer was...


It's good old Cameron Diaz! We hope you got it. A new one Screwed Up celeb is on it's way. Why not check out the other ones here.

Saturday, 9 August 2008

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz


Can you guess who it is this week? Good luck!

Why is Beyonce White?


The makers of the advert deny any alteration was made to this image to make her look more white.

Vote Paris!


Friends of Celebrities
The first agency supplying grounded friends to celebrities
Monday 11th August 2008

www.friendsofcelebrities.com

Special political edition. Not. But Paris Hilton was officially hot this week, nominating herself as a presidential candidate.

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Multi Million Pounds Babies
$15 million. That’s what magazines Hello! and People paid for the first pics of Brangelina’s new additions (editions?). Better still, all the cash will go to the Jolie-Pitt charitable foundation.

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Joss Stone head-butts brother
Soul singer, Joss Stone head-butted her own half-brother at the Christening of his child. She got into an argument after she was late, despite being the Godmother.

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Heath Ledger
Mark Kate Olsen has refused to talk to police leading the enquiry about her friend Heath Ledgers death, without first demanding anonymity. Which, as the only one of his friends to do this, begs the question what does she have to hide? The case though is now closed.

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This Weeks Top Celebrity Searches

1. Angelina Jolie
2. Brad Pitt
3. Heath Ledger
4. Morgan Freeman
5. Paris Hilton

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BUY YOUR FAVOURITE CELEB AS A GREETINGS CARD NOW!

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Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz
Did you get that last week’s answer to the quiz? It’s posted now on the blog, so check it out. There’s a new quiz posted here plus a whole lot of other stuff too.

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Relationships On:
Sienna Miller + Balthazar Getty

Relationships Off:
Sienna Miller + Balthazar Getty

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Watch Out New York
Evil woman Heather Mills is looking for a New York pad with her ill-gotten gains. She had to answer questions in order to buy a flat in a swanky portered apartment block. My advice to the panel is whatever answer she gave – the truth is probably the opposite.

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Beyonce Turned White
A L’Oreal advert has been criticised after Beyonce Knowles seemed to be made to look white with blonde hair. We think she looks hot in her natural skin colour. Check out the picture here.

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Madonna has the most requested body parts for plastic surgery patients.

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Morgan Freeman Crash
The actor crashed his car in Mississippi, rolling it many times. He suffered several broken bones but is said to be fine. Get well soon!

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Pete Doherty Sinks to New Low
A boating trip for Mr Doherty ended in disaster when the rowing boat sprung a leak in Scotland biggest lake, Loch Lomond. Everyone though it was hilarious until one realised, “we could have drowned.”

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Iggy Pop Crime
Iggy Pop’s gear has been nicked. No, not drugs. His music equipment. If you are offered any knocked off guitars, be a good one of the Friends of Celebrities and let him know.

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Why does Katie Holmes look more and more like husband Tom Cruise every day?

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Madonna’s Landlord Trouble
The pop singers London pub – The Punchbowl – was under fire after it turned out it was charging higher prices to tourists. This is illegal and could mean she loses the licence to her local which she bought last year.

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P-Diddy and Jay-Z and Beyonce are all looking for homes in posh Mayfair, London.

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From Russia In Love
Allegedly fallen rock legend Ronnie Wood has moved his teen lover into a hotel near his rehab. She also has her own chaffeur driven car so she can visit Ronnie whenever he wants.

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And finally…
Paris Hilton’s presidential manifesto is:
1. Paint the Whitehouse pink
2. Make Rihanna Vice-President
3. Not to promise change but just to be hot.
She has our vote!!!

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Thanks for signing up. You’re a great one of the Friends of Celebrities. Make sure you invite your friends too.

John
Founder, The Friends of Celebrities

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz Answer was...


Did you get the answer this week? It was bad boy turned good - Jack Osbourne. see if you can find other members of the Osbourne family in the Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz, just click 'QUIZ' on the right hand side menu. More next week, too!

Wednesday, 6 August 2008

Morgan Freeman Crash


Mr Freeman is doing fine after crashing his car and flipping it several times. He will need several Friends of Celebrities to sign his cast. Why not leave his a message in the comments of this post.

Monday, 4 August 2008

Next Weeks News - Winehouse Crack-Pipe Spiked


LONDON, ENGLAND – Singer Amy Winehouse has blamed her fall from grace and into drug addiction on one of her friends spiking her crack-pipe with an illegal substance, it was reported today. Sources close to the popstress also claimed that somebody could have even put a bit of crack on that tin foil that she was seen heating with a lighter for no reason – to deadly effects. “She believes that the person who spiked her drink with an ‘E’ tablet could be the same one putting crack all over the place and pouring VODKA in her orange juice.” said one close friend. “She’s going to get her Dad on whoever did this just to prove it’s not her fault. Meanwhile, Pete Doherty has been complaining of dizziness and strange euphoria after someone might have repeatly put something funny into his 'art' syringes and repeatedly and habitually injected this substance into his arms.

Sunday, 3 August 2008

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz


Who's this then? Answer next week. Good luck.

Who put the 'E' in Amy WinEhouse


Friends of Celebrities
The first agency supplying grounded friends to celebrities
Monday 4th August 2008

www.friendsofcelebrities.com

Oh my God, what a week. No need to spend loads of cash on glossy magazines during the credit crunch with your weekly update from The Friends of Celebrities.

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Spiked
Amy Winehouse hit the headlines this week by being admitted to hospital. The first reason given was a reaction to the medication she’s taking to wean her off her crack cocaine addiction. Then the next day it turns out a hanger-on had spiked her drink with an E tablet. Stay away from those people Amy. Hire one of the Friends of Celebrities, instead!

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Ramsay Nearly Toast
Celebrity Chef Gordon Ramsay (who desperately tries to make cooking seem the height of masculinity) admitted nearly being killed filming his latest show. He fell down into a creek in Iceland and was dragged under by his heavy boots. Luckily, he was rescued by a cameraman. He also was nearly killed by his wife when she found out. Dead Celebrity Chef? Done!

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This Weeks Top Celebrity Searches

1. Amy Winehouse
2. Angelina Jolie
3. Heath Ledger
4. Jessica Alba
5. Paris Hilton

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BUY YOUR FAVOURITE CELEB AS A GREETINGS CARD NOW!

-----------------------

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz
Did you get that last week’s answer to the quiz? It’s posted now on the blog, so check it out. There’s a new quiz posted here plus a whole lot of other stuff too.

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Jack White and Alicia Keys have been chosen to sing the theme to latest Bond film, The Quantum of Solace.

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Relationships Off:
Lance Armstrong + Kate Hudson

Relationships On:
Britney Spears + Her Bodyguard
Petra Nemcova + Oil Boss, Badr Jafar

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Car Crash
Indiana Jones star Shia LaBeouf found himself upside-down after crashing his car following a few shots in a bar. He was arrested for drink driving at the scene and charged with DUI. It seems though, that the crash was not his fault as another driver ran a red light.

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Two Other Run Ins with Law
Shia LaBeouf has previously been charged with trespass (later dropped) and fined for smoking in a prohibited area.

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Are Destiny’s Child re-uniting? That’s what Beyonce father and manager hinted at this week.

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Damian Hirst Forgery’s
Artist and self proclaimed enfant-terrible has accidentally bought $180,000 worth of Vivienne Westwood knock-offs. The fakes from a museum collection and from the original punk days. Hirst got Westwood’s ex-husband Malcolm McClaren himself to confirm their authenticity. Which he promptly did quite the opposite.

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Hello! Magazine have snapped up the first pictures of Brangelina’s new twins Knox and Vivienne.

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And finally…
Ridley Scott’s latest film version of Robin Hood has been shelved for a year because of the wrong kind of leaves. Filming was due to start in a forest but it was soon obvious that the leaves will start changing colour for Autumn, meaning the film would have different coloured leaves through out it. Filming will commence next year, a little earlier in the season.

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Check out the website for more fun this week. Thanks for signing up.

John
Founder, The Friends of Celebrities

Screwed Up Celebrity Quiz Answer was...


Did you get it? It's Bonkers Pop Princess Bjork. Click on 'Quiz' for previous Screwed Up Celebs right now.